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How Does Divorce Affect Children?

Divorce often takes a significant emotional and psychological toll on children. If you’re going through a divorce, you’re likely wondering, What does divorce do to a child? How does it impact their well-being? Will your child adjust, or could this lead to long-term emotional and behavioral issues? These are natural questions to ask, and proactively addressing these concerns can significantly improve your child’s adjustment process. Below, we explore the effects of divorce on children and how legal representation can help you prioritize your child’s needs.

What Does Divorce Do to a Child and Their Relationships?

Divorce can impact a child’s relationships within the family, such as with parents and siblings. It can also impact their social relationships with friends and peers. The disruption of the family structure might lead to feelings of mistrust or fear of abandonment. These feelings can result in some children struggling to form or maintain friendships. Others may experience difficulties in their relationships with their parents, particularly if one parent becomes less involved post-divorce.

As a parent, you can play a key role in helping your child maintain healthy relationships despite the divorce. Encouraging open communication, showing plenty of love, maintaining stability as much as possible, and having support from both parents will all help your child adjust in a more healthy way. A skilled attorney can help craft a co-parenting plan that fosters healthy relationships between the child and both parents, reducing the likelihood of strained familial bonds.

How Does Divorce Affect Children Emotionally?

The emotional impact of divorce on children can differ based on the child’s age, temperament, and the level of conflict between the parents. Younger children may struggle to understand the situation and blame themselves for the separation. They could experience confusion, anxiety, and fear about the future.

Older children and teenagers may process their emotions differently. They might exhibit anger, sadness, or even withdraw from social activities. They could also become resentful toward one or both parents. Open communication and emotional support are critical to helping children express and cope with these feelings. Providing reassurance and allowing your child to express their emotions can help mitigate the impact of divorce on children.

Effects of Divorce on Children: Mental Health

Divorce doesn’t just trigger immediate emotional responses—it can also take a lasting toll on your child’s mental health. Research has shown that children of divorced parents are more likely to experience anxiety, depression, and other psychological challenges. For some children, these issues may persist into adulthood, potentially affecting their self-esteem, friendships, and romantic relationships.

However, this does not mean every child of divorced parents will face these challenges. By ensuring your child has access to mental health resources, you can significantly reduce the risks. Keeping an eye out for signs of mental distress, such as changes in behavior, sleeping patterns, or academic performance, is critical. If you notice these red flags, seeking professional help early can prevent deeper issues from developing.

How Does Divorce Impact a Child’s Academic Performance?

Divorce can shake up a child’s school life. Many kids struggle to focus and see their grades slip. Others might start missing more school days. These changes can be especially pronounced if your divorce involves high levels of conflict and tension in the home environment.

Often, children thrive best if they have routine and structure, which divorce may disturb. You can mitigate these academic effects by maintaining open communication with teachers, encouraging your child to continue to engage in school activities, and providing consistency at home. Maintaining a sense of normalcy can help your child remain focused and engaged in their education.

What Role Does Stability Play in a Child’s Post-Divorce Life?

Stability is key to helping children cope with divorce. Maintaining routines, keeping traditions, and providing a consistent support system are crucial for your child’s emotional and psychological health. Changes in living situations, schools, or friendships can be stressful for children, but proper planning can facilitate smoother transitions.

A skilled attorney can help you create a parenting plan that prioritizes stability, whether through a shared custody arrangement or specific guidelines for visitation. The more predictable your child’s environment, the easier it will be for them to adjust to life post-divorce.

What Can You Do to Support Your Child During a Divorce?

As a parent, your actions can affect how your child experiences divorce. Here are some proactive steps you can take.

Keep Conflict Away from Your Child

Even if tensions run high between you and your spouse, shielding your child from conflict is essential. Avoid arguing in front of your child, never vent or complain about your ex in front of your child, and do not ask them to take sides.

Maintain Routines and Consistency

Keeping bedtime the same, continuing weekend activities, and providing structure can give your child a sense of security amidst the changes.

Encourage Open Communication

Make sure your child knows that talking about their feelings is okay. Validating their emotions will help them feel supported and understood.

Seek Professional Help When Needed

If you notice your child struggling with the changes, don’t hesitate to seek counseling or therapy. Talking to a neutral third party can sometimes be incredibly beneficial for children.

Can a Divorce Lawyer Help Minimize the Negative Effects of Divorce on Children?

Divorce is undoubtedly challenging for children, but having a knowledgeable attorney can help mitigate many potential negative effects of divorce on children. A lawyer experienced in family law can help you navigate the complexities of the divorce process while keeping your child’s best interests at the forefront. Your attorney knows how to negotiate or fight for fair custody arrangements. They know how much child support should be awarded and how to get you the spousal support you need to keep your child’s life intact. A seasoned attorney can also provide access to resources such as counseling and education support when necessary.

Your attorney will also act as a buffer between you and your spouse, reducing conflict and helping to maintain a peaceful and respectful process. This creates a less stressful environment for your child. Working closely with an attorney who understands your family’s unique needs, you can ensure that your divorce agreement supports your child’s well-being.

Prioritizing Your Child’s Well-Being in Divorce

Divorce will inevitably bring changes, but with the right approach, you can minimize the effects of divorce on children and help them adjust in a healthy and supportive environment. At Plog & Stein P.C., we know your child’s well-being is your top priority, and we’re here to help. With decades of experience and a deep commitment to family law, our attorneys will work closely with you to craft solutions that keep your child’s needs front and center. Let us take care of the legal complexities so you can focus on what matters most—helping your family move forward.

 

Resources:

  • Children and Divorce. HelpGuide.org, link 
  • The Effects of Divorce on Children & How to Help Them Cope. Choosing Therapy, link
  • 10 Effects of Divorce on Children — and Helping Them Cope. Healthline (2020), link
  • The Impact of Divorce on Children. Psychology Today (2022), link
  • 10 Commandments of Good Parenting. WebMD, link
  • The Long Term Psychological Effects of Divorce on Children. Mediate.com (2021), link
  • How Parents Can Help Children Cope With Separation/Divorce. Encyclopedia on Early Childhood Development (2020), link

 

Author Photo

Stephen Plog, co-founder of Plog & Stein, P.C. in 1999, is a dedicated family law attorney with almost two decades of expertise in Denver. Focused exclusively on family law since 2001, he excels in both intricate legal writing and courtroom litigation, having navigated cases in all Denver metropolitan area District Courts. Steve’s comprehensive background, including a Bachelor’s Degree in Psychology and a law degree from Quinnipiac University School of Law, underscores his commitment to providing insightful and personalized representation in family law matters.